ahhhhhhh FrEaK oUt!!!

how can I be such a utter failer at everything I do?
today ends lacking.
it lacked that patience I told myself to have.
the love
the honesty.

I feel totally under a large blanket of pressure.
a spirtiual attack?
perhaps.
yes
but I can't blame my behavior on others.
cant' say the devil made me do it.
I know that only I can make me do.

and I let it all happen today.

but,
children are so loving
so forgiving

I recognize my critical nature comes from the home I grew up in.
and yet I am *fairly* well adjusted and secure.
so too, I hope, my children will look back and see the joy
the love
the fun times.

please don't hang on the mistakes.
please know that under the freak out loose it mom is an I love you more than words can express mom
you are worthy
and beautiful.